Feast of the Epiphany 2023

So, how are you doing with your New Year’s Resolutions? Last week I told you improving relationships is a popular resolution for people at the beginning of the year. It is so popular because good relationships with those close to us are vital for enjoying life, and we want them to be as beneficial as possible. 

I told you that improving relationships depend on many things to be successful. We need realistic expectations for them. No single relationship can satisfy all our needs. Conflict enters every relationship, even good ones, so we must be prepared to deal with it as part of even our best relationships. We need to be flexible in our friendships and recognize that they ebb and flow with life.

In our post-pandemic world, many people recognize that they need to reboot relationships so they can be fulfilling. This week I read an article on relationship building by Elizabeth Bernstein of the Wall Street Journal. She entitled her piece “Create a Post pandemic Life of Rich Connections.” Bernstein recapped some suggestions passed on to her from readers. One reader found it helpful to invite small groups of friends for a casual evening rather than staging a large party. Bernstein suggested experiencing something new, like trying a new restaurant, tasting a new wine, or taking a walk through a different neighborhood to reinvigorate a relationship. Someone suggested doing something frightening like riding a roller coaster with a person you want to get to know better. 

Picking up the phone to talk to someone was another suggestion. Bernstein lamented that so many people let all their phone calls go to voicemail these days. They seem to want to know what we want to talk about before they are willing to invest in a conversation. She told of a man who keeps a list of important days in the lives of his friends and family, such as birthdays, anniversaries, etc. and calls them on that day.

The scriptures are full of incidents concerning trying to renew a relationship with God. Today’s reading from the prophet Isaiah comes from when the Jewish people were preparing to return from exile in Babylon. About fifty years before, the Babylonians had conquered Jerusalem and herded the Israelites into captivity. Now the Babylonians themselves have been conquered by the Persians. The Persian king decided to allow the Jews to return to their homeland, but many people wondered if returning to Jerusalem would be worthwhile. They had established families and built lives in Babylon. They would be returning to a city that was in shambles, and it would be a struggle to rebuild. Isaiah encourages them to return to Jerusalem by telling them that foreign people hungry for a relationship with God will come to Jerusalem. They will bear gifts to offer to God and make the city prosperous and powerful.

Paul, in the Letter to the Ephesians, also discusses relationships. There was a controversy troubling the early Church. It was the question of whether Gentiles had to become Jewish by being circumcised before they could become Christians. Paul tells the Gentile Ephesians not to worry. They can have as complete a relationship with Jesus without first becoming Jews. They are coheirs, members of the same body, copartners with the Jews as sharers in the promise of Jesus Christ. 

The Magi were looking for a relationship reboot too. They were men who studied the skies, trying to get clues about the secrets of life and how to live well. They saw the Star of Bethlehem and were intrigued by it, believing it signaled a king’s birth. They wanted to be introduced to him and start a relationship with this new king. Since their relationships with God had atrophied, the religious authorities in Jerusalem weren’t that interested in finding the Messiah, and Herod only saw the Christ child as a threat to his power.

Jesus, the only Son of God, came as a human being to help us to know God wants to have a close relationship with us. God wants us to feel His love and compassion, forgiveness, and mercy. Not everyone feels that way about God. Last week I told you about a writer for America Magazine Googling the question, “Why does God...” and finding the third most popular completion of that question was “...hate me?” Many people feel God is out to get them because of the pain and suffering they experience in life.

I had a God moment this week. It was one of those times when we experience something that couldn’t just be a coincidence. Clearly, the Holy Spirit is at work. It happened after Daily Mass on Monday. I came out of the church, crossed the street, heading to the rectory. I noticed a couple of pieces of litter caught in the branches of the hedge across the street. I was brought up to pick up trash even if it isn’t in your yard. So, I bent over to pluck them from the bushes. One piece turned out to be a discarded face mask, and the other was a letter-sized sheet of paper neatly folded into fours. Normally, I would have crinkled up both pieces of trash and stuffed them into my pocket until I got to a wastebasket. 

For some reason, I decided to open up the sheet of paper to see what it was. It was a sort of end-of-year musing by a man who called himself a student of life. He said sometimes he felt worthless and struggled with good and evil. At times he felt as if he were falling with nothing to break the fall, and the devil was laughing at him. Then in desperation, he would turn to prayer, and God would break his fall. He claimed he felt he was forging chains of failure around his body like Joseph Marley, the character in Charles Dicken’s Christmas Carol. He said he thought he was dragging his chains through life and only hoped God had the key to them when he died. It was genuinely heart-wrenching to read the man’s statement. I don’t know how the man’s message came to be caught in the hedge. I don’t know how I came to open it to read. I believe the Holy Spirit had a great deal to do with it. This week I’ve prayed for that man and those struggling to find a relationship of peace with God. 

Is it worth having a relationship with God? The answer is a resounding yes! In my experience and those of so many followers of Jesus, a relationship with our Lord makes our other relationships more satisfying. Today the scriptures tell us God wants a relationship with us whether we live in Babylon, Jerusalem, or any other place. God wants a relationship with us, whether we are Jews or Gentiles, Circumcised or Uncircumcised. God wants a relationship with us if we are as wise as Magi or unlearned as shepherds. 

Last week I shared the advice of Jim McDermott from an article in America Magazine. He encouraged those distant from God to sit for a few minutes and imagine God sitting next to them. Put a smile of love and encouragement on God’s face. Try to put feelings of low self-worth aside and let the warmth of God’s smile shine on you.

Prayer is the key to our relationship with God, and we need to pray every day if we want a loving relationship with God. Do you pray every day or just when you want something from God? Do you only pray when you feel you are in a real nosedive? Start with as little as ten minutes, quietly putting yourself in the presence of God. Maybe read a short passage from one of the gospels and ask yourself what God is trying to tell you. After every few days, add a couple of minutes to your prayer time. If we draw near to God, God will draw near to us.

So, it isn’t too late to resolve to strengthen your relationship with God this new year. If you made that your new year’s resolution and have allowed it to fall by the wayside, recommit to it today. If we are persistent in our desire to deepen our relationship with God, grace will come to us to support us. The most potent source of grace is the Eucharist we are about to celebrate. As you come forward to receive the Body, Blood, Soul, and Divinity of Jesus Christ, open your soul to God’s grace and let your relationship with our Lord shine as a light to the world.